Life is beautiful


As I jumped off the building's 11th floor...........

10th floor

9th floor

7th floor

6th floor

4th floor



 3rd floor


2nd floor

Now the ground zero


Ya. Life in all its sorrows and happiness, is still beautiful and precious....
Do make the best of it..........Only Cheers....n....smiles are counted.
So u better be prepared to smile at whoever u come across





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jokes3


I asked my new girlfriend what sort of books she's interested in, she said: Check books.
"Take a pencil and paper," the teacher said, "and write an essay with the title 'If I Were a Millionaire'"
Everyone but Philip, who leaned back with arms folded, began to write furiously.
"What's the matter," the teacher asked. "Why don't you begin?"
"I'm waiting for my secretary," he replied.
Nurse: A beautiful woman who holds your hand for one full minute and then expects your pulse to be normal
Wife's definition of retirement: Twice as much husband on half as much pay.
The easiest way to make your old car run better, is to check the prices of new car.
Sometimes when I reflect back on all the ciggarettes I smoked, i feel ashamed. Then I look into the ciggarette & think about the workers in the ciggarette factory & all of their hopes & dreams. If I dont smoke this ciggarette, they might be out of work & their dreams would be shattered, Then I say to myself, it's better that I smoke this ciggarette & let their dreams come true then be selfish & worry about my LUNGS.

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Jokes 2


"Take a pencil and paper," the teacher said, "and write an essay with the title 'If I Were a Millionaire'"
Everyone but Philip, who leaned back with arms folded, began to write furiously.
"What's the matter," the teacher asked. "Why don't you begin?"
"I'm waiting for my secretary," he replied.

• Q: What's the difference between a good lawyer and a great lawyer?
A: A good lawyer knows the law. A great lawyer knows the judge.

• Nurse: A beautiful woman who holds your hand for one full minute and then expects your pulse to be normal
• Did you ever walk in a room and forget why you walked in? I think that's how dogs spend their lives.
• I asked my new girlfriend what sort of books she's interested in, she said: Check books.
• A blonde was being admonished by the doctor: Until the penicillin cleans out ur infection, u r to have no relations whatsoever!
Pausing for a moment, blonde replied: Ok, but what about friends & neighbors?
• When the best actors are chosen by other actors, it's called the Oscars. When the best actors are chosen by the people, it's called an election.
• Wife's definition of retirement: Twice as much husband on half as much pay.

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Jokes


1980 girls: Maa main yeh Jeans pehanungi

Maa : Nahin beti log kya kahengey ?
2006 girls: Maa mein mini skirt pehanungi
Maa: Pehen le beti kuch to pehan le!
******************************************************
Similarity between Gandhiji & Mallika?
Dono ne kapde tyag diye,
ek ne desh ke liye,
doosre ne Deshwasion ke liye!
*****************************************************
Exams ke 4 din pehle syllabus dekha to yaad aaya,
Kuch To Hua Hai Kuch Ho Gaya Hai,
Exams ke din paper dekh kar yaad aaya,
Sab Kuch Alag Hai Sab Kuch Naya Hai
*****************************************************
Judge: U r crossing the limits.
Lawyer: Kaun Saala aisa kehta hai?
Judge: How dare you call me saala?
Lawyer: My Lod, I said kaun 'Sa Law' kehta hai?
******************************************************
Bhikhari: Saab 1 rupaya de do.
Saheb: Kal aana.
Bhikhari: Saala is kal-kal ke chakkar mein is colony mein mere lakhon
rupaye fase huye hain.
******************************************************
FOOL se, FOOL ne,
FOOLon ki FOOLwari main
FOOL ke sath wish kiya '
You are the most beautiFOOL,
colorFOOL & wonderFOOL amongst all FOOLS
******************************************************
What do u call a woman in heaven?
An Angel.
A crowd of woman in heaven?
A host of Angels.
And all woman in heaven?
PEACE ON EARTH!
******************************************************
What's the diff between Dava & Daru?
Dava is like girlfriend,
that comes with expiry date and Daru is like wife,
Jitni purani hogi utna sir chad ke bolegi.
******************************************************
A Chinese couple Mr & Miss Hua got twins without marriage.
What did they named them?
They named them as 'Jo-Hua', 'So-Hua'
******************************************************
What did Tarzan think when he saw a dead Cheetah? Wow! New Underwear.
******************************************************
Paani mein Whiskey milao ta nasha chadta hai.
Paani mein Rum milao to nasha chadta hai.
Paani mein Brandy milao to nasha chadta hai.
Saala paani mein hi kuch gadbad hai.

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Healthy Living! - Prevention from Back Pain


Some of us sit in the same position for the hours in the office or probably ride a bike for long distances. More often than not, this results in a back pain. Ignoring this may not be a very good idea.

Having said that, attached are images of some very simple exercises that can be followed for about 10 mins every morning and prevent strain on that back.
Enjoy a healthy living....
Also attached is pdf on BACK PAIN....


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Two Ethical Questions...


Two Ethical Questions
Question 1:
If You Knew A Woman Who Was Pregnant, Who Had 8 Kids Already, Three Who Were Deaf, Two Who Were Blind, One Mentally Retarded, And She Had Syphilis....
Would You Recommend That She Have An Abortion?
Read The Next Question Before Scrolling Down To The Answer Of This One.
Question 2:
It Is Time To Elect The World Leader, And Your Vote Counts. Here Are The Facts About The Three Leading Candidates.
Candidate A Associates With Crooked Politicians, And Consults With Astrologists. He's Had Two Mistresses. He Also Chain Smokes And Drinks 8 To 10 Martinis A Day.

Candidate B He Was Kicked Out Of Office Twice, Sleeps Until Noon, Used Opium In College And Drinks A Quart Of Whisky Every Evening.



Candidate C He Is A Decorated War Hero. He's A Vegetarian, Doesn't Smoke, Drinks An Occasional Beer And Hasn't Had Any Extra Marital Affairs.
Which Of These Candidates Would Be Your Choice?



Decide First, No Peeking, Then Scroll Down For The Answer.
Candidate A Is Franklin D. Roosevelt
Candidate B Is Winston Churchill
Candidate C Is Adolph Hitler
 And By The Way:
The Answer To The Abortion Question- If You Said Yes, You Just Killed Beethoven... The Woman Was His Mother

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Importance of Effective Communication


Importance of Effective Communication: A very prim, proper, and religious young lady was planning a vacation for herself and her husband. Knowing that he liked to go camping, she decided to book a camping trip to his favorite place. She wanted to make sure the campground was fully equipped, so she wrote a letter to the campground  to find out about the facilities. In her letter, she just couldn't write the word toilet. She thought about writing bathroom commode, but that seemed just as vulgar to her. Therefore she decided to use the initials B.C. The sentence in the letter actually read " Does your campground have it's own B.C."
When the campground owner got the letter, he couldn't figure out what B.C.meant. After showing it to his wife and some other campers, they finally determined that B.C. meant Baptist Church. So the lady wanted to know about the local Baptist church. Therefore when he wrote her back, he wrote:

Dear Madam,

I regret the delay in answering your letter. I am very glad to inform you that a B.C. is located just 9 miles north of the campground, and has a seating capacity of 250 people. I admit it is a bit far away if you are in a habit of going regularly, but you'll be pleased to know that many people take a lunch with them and make a day of it.
The last time my wife and I went was about two months ago, and it was so crowded we had to stand up the whole time we were there. It may interest you to know there is a supper planned to raise money to buy more seats.
    I would like to say it pains me greatly to not be able to go more regularly, but it is not for a lack of desire on my part. As we grow older, it seems to be more of an effort.
If you decide to come to the campground, perhaps I could go along with you. I'd be glad to sit with you and introduce you to the other folks.  You'll find this is a very friendly community!

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Great Mother











God cannot reach everywhere...So he created Mothers on the Earth!!!
A simple, yet very expressive snap!
MOTHER IS GOD'S Best GIFT.

If God is great, (Amma, Aai, Amme, Ma, Mom, Mummy................is the greatest.)
THERE IS NOTHING IN THE WORLD BETTER THAN MOTHER'S LOVE.......


Baby Monkey hit by bike at Jaipur {India}
but monkey mother...... . we already know the Mother history.
Maa Tujhe Salaam





Nothing in this world is better than a Mother...

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Strength and weakness


Strength and weakness
A 10-year-old boy decided to study judo despite the fact that he had lost his left arm in a! devastating car accident.

The boy began lessons with an old Japanese judo master. The boy was doing well, so he couldn't understand why, after three months of training the master had taught him only one move.

"Sensei,"(Teacher in Japanese) the boy finally said, "Shouldn't I be learning more moves? "This is the only move you know, but this is the only move you'll ever need to know," the sensei replied.
Not quite understanding, but believing in his teacher, the boy kept training. Several months later, the sensei took the boy to his first tournament.

Surprising himself, the boy easily won his first two matches. The third match proved to be more difficult, but after some time, his opponent became impatient and charged; the boy deftly used his one move to win the match. Still amazed by his success, the boy was now in the finals. This time, his opponent was bigger, stronger, and more experienced. For a while, the boy appeared to be overmatched. Concerned that the boy might get hurt, the referee called a time-out.  He was about to stop the match when the sensei intervened.

"No," the sensei insisted, "Let him continue." Soon after the match resumed, his opponent made a critical mistake: he dropped his guard. Instantly, the boy used his move to pin him. The boy had won the match and the tournament.

He was the champion. On the way home, the boy and sensei reviewed every move in each and every match.

Then the boy summoned the courage to ask what was really on his mind.

"Sensei, how did I win the tournament with only one move?"

"You won for two reasons," the sensei answered."First, you've almost mastered one of the most difficult throws in all of judo. And second, the only known defense for that move is for your opponent to grab your left arm." The boy's biggest weakness had become his biggest strength.



Moral of the story:



Sometimes we feel that we have certain weaknesses and we blame God, the circumstances or ourselves for it but we never know that our weaknesses can become our strengths one day.
Each of us is special and important, so never think you have any weakness, never think of pride or pain, just live your life to its fullest and extract the best out of it!"

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Corporate Life


One day while walking down the street a highly successful  Human Resources Manager was tragically hit by a bus and she died. Her soul arrived up in heaven where she was met at the Pearly Gates by St. Peter himself.

"Welcome to Heaven," said St. Peter. "Before you get settled in though, it seems we have a problem. You see, strangely enough, we've never once had a Human Resources Manager make it this far and we're not really sure what to do with you."

"No problem, just let me in," said the woman.

"Well, I'd like to, but I have higher orders. What we're going to do is let you have a day in Hell and a day in Heaven and then you can choose whichever one you want to spend an eternity in."
"Actually, I think I've made up my mind, I prefer to stay in Heaven", said the woman

"Sorry, we have rules..."

And with that St. Peter put the executive in an elevator and it went down-down-down to hell.

The doors opened and she found herself stepping out onto the putting green of a beautiful golf course. In the distance was a country club and standing in front of her were all her friends - fellow executives that she had worked with and they were well dressed in evening gowns and cheering for her. They ran up and kissed her on both cheeks and they talked about old times. They played an excellent round of golf and at night went to the country club where she enjoyed an excellent steak and lobster dinner.

She met the Devil who was actually a really nice guy (kind of cute) and she had a great time telling jokes and dancing. She was having such a good time that before she knew it, it was time to leave. Everybody shook her hand and waved goodbye as she got on the elevator.

The elevator went up-up-up and opened back up at the Pearly Gates and found St. Peter waiting for her.

"Now it's time to spend a day in heaven," he said. So she spent the next 24 hours lounging around on clouds and playing the harp and singing. She had great time and before she knew it her 24 hours were up and St. Peter came and got her.
"So, you've spent a day in hell and you've spent a day in heaven. Now you must choose your eternity,"

The woman paused for a second and then replied, "Well, I never thought I'd say this, I mean, Heaven has been really great and all, but I think I had a better time in Hell."

So St. Peter escorted her to the elevator and again she went down-down-down back to Hell.

When the doors of the elevator opened she found herself standing in a desolate wasteland covered in garbage and filth. She saw her friends were dressed in rags and were picking up the garbage and putting it in sacks.

The Devil came up to her and put his arm around her.

"I don't understand," stammered the woman, "yesterday I was here and there was a golf course and a country club and we ate lobster and we danced and had a great time. Now all there is a wasteland of garbage and all my friends look miserable."

The Devil looked at her smiled and told...
 "Yesterday we were recruiting you, today you're an Employee

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Why the Wedding Ring Worn over 4th Finger..!!!


Why should the wedding ring be worn on the fourth finger?
There is a beautiful and convincing explanation given by the Chinese.
Firstly, open your palms (face to face), bend the middle fingers and hold them together - back to back
Secondly, open and hold the remaining three fingers and the thumb - tip to tip
(As shown in the figure)
Thumb represents your -------------------Parents
Second (Index) finger represents your-----Siblings
Middle finger represents your-------------Self
Fourth (Ring) finger represents your------Life Partner
& Last (Little) finger represents your--- Children
Now, try to Separate your Thumbs (representing the parents)..., they will open, because your parents are not destined to live with you lifelong (Sorry but its the Truth), and have to leave you sooner or later.

Please join your thumbs as before and separate your Index fingers (representing siblings)... ., they will also open, because your brothers and sisters will have their own families and will have to lead their own separate lives.

Now join the Index fingers and separate your Little fingers (representing your children)... ., they will open too, because the children also will get married and settle down on their own some day.

Finally, join your Little fingers, and try to separate your Ring fingers (representing your spouse).
You will be surprised to see that you just CAN NOT ..,

Coz Husband &Wife have to remain together all their lives - through thick and thin.. !!

ISN'T THIS A LOVELY THEORY.. ??

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The Art of Giving


"Rivers do not drink their own water, nor do tree eat their own fruit, nor do rain clouds eat the grains reared by them. The wealth of the noble is used solely for the benefit of others?

Even after accepting that giving is good and that one must learn to give, several questions need to be answered.

The first question is 'when should one give?'

Yudhisthir asks a beggar seeking alms to come the next day. On this, Bhim rejoices, that Yudhisthir his brother, has conquered death! For he is sure that he will be around tomorrow to give. Yudhisthir gets the message.

One does not know really whether one will be there tomorrow to give! The time to give therefore is NOW.
The next question is 'how much to give?' One recalls the famous incident from history.

Rana Pratap was reeling after defeat from the Moghals. He had lost his army , he had lost his wealth , and most important he had lost hope, his will to fight.

At that time in his darkest hour , his erstwhile minister Bhamasha came seeking him and placed his entire fortune at the disposal of Rana Pratap. With this, Rana Pratap raised an army and lived to fight another day.

The answer to this question how much to give is " Give as much as you can!

The next question is 'what to give?'

It is not only money that can be given. It could be a flower or even a smile. It is not how much one gives but how one gives that really matters.
When you give a smile to a stranger that may be the only good thing received by him in days and weeks!

"You can give anything but you must give with your heart ! One also needs answer to this question 'whom to give?'

Many times we avoid giving by finding fault with the person who is seeking.

However, being judgmental and rejecting a person on the presumption that he may not be the most deserving is not justified.

"Give without being judgmental!"
Next we have to answer 'How to give?

Coming to the manner of giving, one has to ensure that the receiver does not feel humiliated, nor the giver feels proud by giving.
'Let not your left hand know what your right hand gives?
Charity without publicity and fanfare, is the highest form of charity.

'Give quietly !
While giving let not the recipient feel small or humiliated. After all what we give never really belonged to us.
We come to this world with nothing and will go with nothing. The thing gifted was only with us for a temporary period.

Why then take pride in giving away something which really did not belong to us? Give with grace and with a feeling of gratitude.

What should one feel after giving ?

We all know the story of Eklavya. When Dronacharya asked him for his right thumb as "Guru = Dakshina".
He unhesitatingly cut off the thumb and gave it to Dronacharya. There is a little known sequel to this story.. Eklavya was asked whether he ever regretted the act of giving away his thumb when he was dying.

His reply was "Yes ! I regretted this only once in my life. It was when Pandavas were coming in to kill Dronacharya who was broken hearted on the false news of death of his son Ashwathama and had stopped fighting.
It was then that I regretted the loss of my thumb. If the thumb was there, no one could have dared hurt my Guru?

The message to us is clear.

Give and never regret giving !

And the last question is ' How much should we provide for our heirs ?

Ask yourself , 'Are we taking away from them the "gift of work? - a source of happiness!
The answer is given by Warren Buffett: "Leave your kids enough to do anything, but not enough to do nothing!"

I would conclude by saying: let us learn the Art of Giving, and quoting Sant Kabir:

"When the wealth in the house increases ,
When water fills a boat ,
Throw them out with both hands !

This is the wise thing to do!

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Fruits


EATING FRUIT...
It's long but very informative
We all think eating fruits means just buying fruits, cutting it and just popping it into our mouths. It's not as easy as you think. It's important to know how and when to eat.
What is the correct way of eating fruits?


IT MEANS NOT EATING FRUITS AFTER YOUR MEALS! * FRUITS SHOULD BE EATEN ON AN EMPTY STOMACH.


If you eat fruit like that, it will play a major role to detoxify your system, supplying you with a great deal of energy for weight loss and other life activities.


FRUIT IS THE MOST IMPORTANT FOOD. Let's say you eat two slices of bread and then a slice of fruit. The slice of fruit is ready to go straight through the stomach into the intestines, but it is prevented from doing so.


In the meantime the whole meal rots and ferments and turns to acid. The minute the fruit comes into contact with the food in the stomach and digestive juices, the entire mass of food begins to spoil....


So please eat your fruits on an empty stomach or before your meals! You have heard people complaining every time I eat watermelon I burp, when I eat durian my stomach bloats up, when I eat a banana I feel like running to the toilet, etc. actually all this will not arise if you eat the fruit on an empty stomach. The fruit mixes with the putrefying other food and produces gas and hence you will bloat!


Graying hair, balding, nervous outburst, and dark circles under the eyes all these will NOT happen if you take fruits on an empty stomach.


There is no such thing as some fruits, like orange and lemon are acidic, because all fruits become alkaline in our body, according to Dr. Herbert Shelton who did research on this matter. If you have mastered the correct way of eating fruits, you have the Secret of beauty, longevity, health, energy, happiness and normal weight.


When you need to drink fruit juice - drink only fresh fruit juice, NOT from the cans. Don't even drink juice that has been heated up. Don't eat cooked fruits because you don't get the nutrients at all. You only get to taste. Cooking destroys all the vitamins.


But eating a whole fruit is better than drinking the juice. If you should drink the juice, drink it mouthful by mouthful slowly, because you must let it mix with your saliva before swallowing it. You can go on a 3-day fruit fast to cleanse your body. Just eat fruits and drink fruit juice throughout the 3 days and you will be surprised when your friends tell you how radiant you look!


KIWI: Tiny but mighty. This is a good source of potassium, magnesium, vitamin E & fiber. Its vitamin C content is twice that of an orange.


APPLE: An apple a day keeps the doctor away? Although an apple has a low vitamin C content, it has antioxidants & flavonoids which enhances the activity of vitamin C thereby helping to lower the risks of colon cancer, heart attack & stroke.


STRAWBERRY: Protective Fruit. Strawberries have the highest total antioxidant power among major fruits & protect the body from cancer-causing, blood vessel-clogging free radicals.


ORANGE : Sweetest medicine. Taking 2-4 oranges a day may help keep colds away, lower cholesterol, prevent & dissolve kidney stones as well as lessens the risk of colon cancer.


WATERMELON: Coolest thirst quencher. Composed of 92% water, it is also packed with a giant dose of glutathione, which helps boost our immune system. They are also a key source of lycopene the cancer fighting oxidant. Other nutrients found in watermelon are vitamin C & Potassium.


GUAVA & PAPAYA: Top awards for vitamin C. They are the clear winners for their high vitamin C content.. Guava is also rich in fiber, which helps prevent constipation. Papaya is rich in carotene; this is good for your eyes.


Drinking Cold water after a meal = Cancer! Can u believe this?? For those who like to drink cold water, this article is applicable to you. It is nice to have a cup of cold drink after a meal. However, the cold water will solidify the oily stuff that you have just consumed. It will slow down the digestion... Once this 'sludge' reacts with the acid, it will break down and be absorbed by the intestine faster than the solid food. It will line the intestine. Very soon, this will turn into fats and lead to cancer. It is best to drink hot soup or warm water after a meal.


A serious note about heart attacks HEART ATTACK PROCEDURE': (THIS IS NOT A JOKE!) Women should know that not every heart attack symptom is going to be the left arm hurting. Be aware of intense pain in the jaw line. You may never have the first chest pain during the course of a heart attack. Nausea and intense sweating are also common symptoms. Sixty percent of people who have a heart attack while they are asleep do not wake up. Pain in the jaw can wake you from a sound sleep. Let's be careful and be aware. The more we know the better chance we could survive.


A cardiologist says if everyone who gets this mail sends it to 10 people, you can be sure that we'll save at least one life.

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This is really interesting


This is amazing and shows that the life is coming full cycle. When our forefathers recommended for purification of water and food before consuption, imagine what kind of research would have gone into it, and that too, thousands of years ago.

Same philosophies are being rediscovered at some other place, and we try to co relate what our forefathers have taught us. Is't it ironical.

Enjoy the piece below !!!!!!

This is really interesting. .....

The Power Of Words Over Water

Can water be affected by our words?

Dr. Masaru Emoto, a Japanese scientist, believes so.

And he has proof.


Dr. Emoto took water droplets, exposed them to various words, music, and environments, and froze them for three hours. He then examined the crystal formations under a dark field microscope. And he took photographs.

The results were totally mind-blowing.

Here’s a photo of ordinary water without any prayer spoken over it. The molecular structure is in disarray.

The photo below is water after the prayer was said. It’s simply breathtaking. (I now have a great respect for praying before meals! More on this later.)

Dr. Emoto also exposed water to Heavy Metal music. Here’s how it looks like. Looks sad if you ask me.

Here’s water exposed to classical music and folk dance music. Looks much better, right?

Next, Dr. Emoto stuck a piece of paper with these words: “You make me sick. I will kill you.” Here’s how the frozen water droplets looks like under the microscope…

Below is how water looked like with the words “Love” over it. The difference is amazing.
This is Polluted water…

This is water from Lourdes , France . Utterly beautiful, right?

Wait A Minute—

Aren’t You Made Up Of Water? Yes! 72% of your body is made up of water.

Imagine how your words affect your own body.

When you say, “I’m a failure,” or “I’m hopeless,” or “I won’t get well,” imagine how these words weaken your health.

Make a choice to say the best words out there. Say often, “I’m wonderful,” and “I’m beautiful,” and “I’m God’s child,” and “God has a great plan for my life!”

It’s not only water.

Dr. Emoto also experimented with cooked rice.

He placed one cup of cooked rice in two airtight jars. On one jar, he wrote, “I love you,” and on the other, “You fool.” Everyday for 30 days, Dr. Emoto would say these words to each jar of rice.

After 30 days, the “I love you” rice was still white. But the “You fool” rice was so rotten, it was black. How can you explain this?

Just as a side note: When I was a child, my mother taught me to pray before meals. Now I realize it wasn’t just a nice thing to do. When I pray over my meal, I know a material transformation takes place in the molecular level of the food that I pray for. I say, “Be blessed,” to the water and food on the table—and I expect it to be blessed

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Women's world


A man was sick and tired
of going to work every day
while his wife stayed home.

He wanted her to see what he went
through so he prayed:
'Dear Lord:


I go to work every day and put
in 8 hours while my wife
merely stays at home.
I want her to know what
I go through.
So, please allow her body to
switch with mine for a day.


' God, in his infinite wisdom,
granted the man's wish.
The next morning, sure enough,
the man awoke as a woman...
He arose, cooked breakfast
for his mate,
Awakened the kids,

Set out their school clothes,
Fed them breakfast,
Packed their lunches,
Drove them to school,
Came home and picked
up the dry cleaning,
Took it to the cleaners
And stopped at the bank
to make a deposit,

Went grocery shopping,
Then drove home to put
away the groceries,

Paid the bills and balanced
the check book.
He cleaned the cat's litter box
and bathed the dog..
Then, it was already 1 P.M.
And he hurried to make the beds,
Do the laundry, vacuum,
Dust, And sweep and mop
the kitchen floor.
Ran to the school to pick up
the kids and got into an argument
with them on the way home.
Set out milk and cookies and
got the kids organized to do
their homework.
Then, set up the ironing board
and watched TV while he
did the ironing.


At 4:30 he began peeling
potatoes and washing
vegetables for salad,
breaded the pork chops
and snapped
fresh beans for supper.

After supper,
He cleaned the kitchen,
Ran the dishwasher,
Folded laundry,
Bathed the kids, And put
them to bed.
At 9 P.M. He was exhausted
and, though his daily chores
weren't finished, he went to
bed where he was expected to
make love, which he managed
to get through with three rounds without complaint.

The next morning, he awoke
and immediately knelt by the
bed and said: -
Lord, I don't know what
I was thinking.
I was so wrong to envy my
wife's being able to stay
home all day.
Please, Oh! Please,
let us trade back.. Amen!'
The Lord, in his infinite wisdom, replied:

'My son, I feel you have


learned your lesson and

I will be happy to change
things back to the way
they were.
You'll just have to wait
nine months, though.
You got pregnant last night


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Lessons in Marketing


Lessons in Marketing
1 You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say: "I am very rich. Marry me!" - That's Direct Marketing

2 You're at a party with a bunch of friends and see a gorgeous girl. One of your friends goes up to her and pointing at you says: "He's very rich. Marry him." - That's Advertising
3 You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and get her telephone number. The next day, you call and say: "Hi, I'm very rich. Marry me." - That's Telemarketing

4 You're at a party and see gorgeous girl. You get up and straighten your tie, you walk up to her and pour her a drink, you open  the door (of the car)for her, pick up her bag after she drops it, offer her ride and then say: By the way, I'm rich. Will you marry me?" -That's Public Relations

5 You're at a party and see gorgeous girl. She walks up to you and says You are very rich! Can you marry ! me?" -That's Brand Recognition

6 You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say: I am very rich. Marry me!" She gives you a nice hard slap on your face. That's Customer Feedback

7 You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say:  "I am very rich. Marry me!" And she introduces you to her husband.That's demand and supply gap

8 You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and before you say anything, another person come and tell her: "I'm rich. Will you marry me?" and she goes with him - That's competition eating into your market share

9 You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and before you say:  "I'm rich, Marry me!" &your wife arrives. -That's restriction for entering new markets

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